March 1st

03 already. scary.

6.30 am

Not too cold. enough energy to make it to the train. just. Then sleep.

Not too cold now- but Leeds is north

Slight regret on choice of jumper

I finally saw the man hanging form the window. Its pretty, like a real painting. Bottom of park street on the left by the bridge. Why are train stations always colder than the rest of the world?
The train stopped at several big cities. Pretty much everyone got off at each one, and then a whole load of new people to look at got on.
Virgin trains really give you a travelling experience, its like a plane on wheels.
-seats, colors, safety booklets, speakers with content.
I was finally one of the many to get off.
A lovely man informed me of the correct pronunciation of Gareforth, of which I'm still not sure. He also pointed me in the direction on my platform, 9D.long platforms
Will I take this journey 6 days a week next year?
So I'm not sure at all. I REALYY hope I'm offered sky, just so that I don't HAVE to take Leeds even though I'm not sure. I need to sleep on it. I need to sleep.
It's a big decision, it could make a lot of difference in the future. Although I suppose its all what you put in to get out. All of today's train journeys have made me feel a bit lonely (and tired) and I supposed being all emotional at this time doesn't help.
I wish I could think positively all the time. I get a little flash of 'oh it'll be fine, everything will be all happy and singing and sunny because ill be positive and make the most of it.' then I get a heavy wave of, come on Steph you know your not like that, its not true.
Maybe I should get one of those self help 'be more positive books'.
I'm lucky to have got this far with all three. Some people have got nothing. Which means I'm doing something right. and if I'm doing right now ill o it right later too. even better then. so both places would be good. BT isn't even in the picture right now. Plus ill have a years experience by then. ha-ha funny.
My mum would just go for it, and make the best of it.
I'm scared about me and Mr.M but that shouldn't stop me. if its meant to be then it will be.
He wants me to take sky
I REALLY hope I get in in time to get the next train. I hope I heave enough money for the bus. I have a sick feeling I don't
Am I getting to used to waiting and travelling these days or is my patience increasing?
JUST got on the train after the door shutting in my face and running to the front of the train.

Closing Thought:
9.55pm on the Number 8
Ok, so I recognize I can get really annoyed even when there's nothing I can do. Maybe that's why it annoys me. BUT I have grown in the way that I can help myself out of the frustrated moods I get into more easily. A few grunts (and sometimes a pretend toddler tantrums) and getting so annoyed makes me giggle. yes giggle. And just for the record that requires a smile.
Its funny, the smallest things can lift me out of a mood. I met someone on the train who was from Leeds, visiting Bristol. A pleasant conversation a few laughs, a friendly goodbye.
I have no idea what his name is but funnily that's not uncommon when you meet people when travelling. At the end of the year I will remember him (well I will now) as the guy who made me forget about things for a little while- I have been alone with my own thoughts for too long today. Thanks.